This is another big one for me.
Chapter 4, section 1 “Right Teaching and Right Learning”, paragraph 7, sentence 1:
“Your worth is not established by teaching or learning. Your worth is established by God.”
Phew… How well I learn is such a huge part of who I believe myself to be. And it’s not surprising, because this has been pounded into all our heads since we were babies. It’s about learning how to speak, how to walk, how well you do in school… So much praise and attention is devoted to this. And then when we get to a point where we can start teaching it very much falls into this same structure. Where WE are now the ones in control, deciding whether to dish out the praise to those underneath us.
And this flows to everything we do. School, work, hobbies, relationships, and so naturally it also taints a spiritual journey. Which is definitely the case for me. I pride myself on how quickly I can pick up these concepts, and when I would “teach” it was very much from a place of “Look how great I am! Let me impress you with how well I understand this.” The focus was very much on me.
So I ask myself “What would it feel like if your worth had nothing to do with how well you learn or teach?”
What a relief… It takes that anxious drive behind my learning and dissolves it. I can relax and sink into the knowledge, instead of focusing on how to grasp it so I can use it as a building block for my ego.